sick & not to mention tired

Not really an ideal uni week to start off. Definately had a rough week though I spilled some excitements with my friends. Here's the thing, my so-called partner walked out on me without actually telling me, expecting me to figure it myself... well, I really thank God forpersonalised me with such attributes -a strong & patience person. I don't know how long more can I hold on, someday I think my head's gonna explode! I gotten even "sick" when I know bad things are said about me. If I'm really that BAD, why hasn't he come forward and say it in front of me? I think I can handle that much better than talking behind my back. Damn, what has all this come to? Turning me into a crime which I've never committed before or I'm just plain blur what had happened last spring/summer? I don't have anyone I can turn to right now, but only some friends I really spelled out as FRIENDS. If friends were to treat you as a friend, then I don't see why such thing is happening. I feel some friends I've known before started avoiding me, thought of what I'm said by others who doesn't know me well enough to say such crap. CRAP! I'm going throught hell of a time now. My heart's telling me to do something about it but I'm weak to even take an action. I need to focus now. Focus on what I want to do and I shouldn't be regretting at the end of the day... I hope.